Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize