He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Randomize
