he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize