Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Randomize