Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
Randomize
