So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
someone owes me an orgasm
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
