I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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