Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
Randomize
