so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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