I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Randomize
