I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
