Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
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