i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
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