waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
Is it because I queefed?
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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