I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
