oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
Randomize
