What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
if i died would you start the facebook group?
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
