Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
Randomize
