He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
Randomize