beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Randomize
