she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
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