i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
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