I just saw a hot homeless man
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Randomize
