just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
Randomize
