and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
I said ACK before Andy Samberg made it even remotely funny. That tool is stealing all my lines.
Yeah, you've definitely been jizzing in your pants years before he made it socially acceptable
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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