next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
