Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Randomize