I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
