i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
Randomize
