You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Randomize
