when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
