Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
well most of my day revolves around power hour
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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