I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize
