No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
Randomize
