They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
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