the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Randomize