He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
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