we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
Randomize
