there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
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