Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
