I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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