i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
