Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
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