you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
fuck your aforementioned shoe
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize
