just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
Randomize