no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
Randomize
