Cold hands, warm shart.
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
honey bunches of taint.
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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