Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
Randomize
