I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
