all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
being pregnant is like rehab
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
