I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
Randomize
