this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
the raccoons are back...
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
