I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Randomize
